Confident Conversations: Ngutati Shimhopileni
You know how there are people in the world who just radiate joyful energy? When you are around them you find yourself smiling but you don't even know why? Ngutati is one of those people. You cant help but feel good when you are around her. She is not afraid to express her opinion and she does it with so much boldness! It had been a while since I'd seen this beautiful young lady and I just had to share her with you guys. It was a warm Windhoek-winter afternoon. After weeks of failed attempts to meet, we finally had a sit down in the Parliament Gardens:
Nelao: How does it feel to be our Power Poise Inspiration of the Week?
Ngutati: It feels so lovely. Feels awesome knowing that I have an opportunity to show people a little bit of who I am and what I stand for.
Nelao: Would you define yourself as a confident?
Ngutati: "Yes I definitely would. Confidence to me is part of the great foundations in life. I am confident and wish more people were (especially women)."
Nelao: Are there a misconception that other people have about you?
Ngutati: "Yes. People tend to think that I am, how we'd say in Namlish, a "Loskop" who has no goals, is wild, a non-achiever, just likes to party and have fun."
Nelao: That's really interesting I would have never guessed. It's so easy for people on the outside to make a decision about who we are without getting to know us. What do you love most about yourself?
Ngutati: I love that I am a very encouraging person. I think at times I believe in people more than they believe in themselves. And at times, that is just the push that people need. I also like that I am a big jokester. I love to laugh and I enjoy making people laugh & smile too.
Nelao: Who in real life inspires you to be confident, bold and authentic?
Ngutati: My parents inspire me to be bold. They are not the type of people to be tamed (as she smiles), so being raised by them only makes it natural for me. My best friend and boyfriend inspire me to be authentic, not only through their wonderful works of art but just who they are and the passion they withhold. They are one of the few people who know me well so they inspire me to stay real. Also, unrealistically (since I don't know them in person), Beyoncé, Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, and Mila J really bring sass to confidence. I love what they stand for and the messages in their art. So uplifting.
Nelao: What is one thing that you think us young woman are struggling with?
Ngutati: I think that most young woman really do suffer from not having a trustworthy manly figure in life. Whether it's a Father or the Father of their children or a Grandfather, a brother etc. It's as though they have a missing piece. Some do fine without one and others just disorient.
Nelao: That is something I agree with as well and hope we can start having that conversation with each other. What do you think is one thing that can bridge the gap and separation among us as women?
Ngutati: Togetherness. As women we need to be more supportive and friendly towards each other because we understand each other best. We have to learn to put our defense down and just be more accepting. I am not saying to put your guard down and trust every woman but rather to be kinder & more respectful to each other. If you see a fellow lady and she has on lovely shoes or her hair looks gorge or you like her make-up: TELL HER!
Nelao: What advice would you give someone who is struggling with confidence?
Ngutati: Stop looking down on yourself, speaking down on yourself, thinking low of yourself. You are what you think & say. Don't base your confidence on anyone else's opinions and thoughts because if they can give it to you then they can also take it away. It all starts with you. Love you and do you then watch how all else falls in place.
Nelao: Do you have a self-care routine? What is it?
Ngutati: Not an orderly one but yes. I love to stay in shape, looking good and feeling better. So I work out at home with my mini-set: a jumping rope, a yoga mat, a ball & some lifts. Then I just follow work-out plans I download from the net. I also like to detox, it's so necessary. I enjoy the outdoors and nature's beautiful views so when I can, I go check out views or go for a walk. Also I have a thing for the sky so sky-watching brings me peace. I've been singing for 6 years. And it is a type of therapy for me. When I sing I forget about any and everything else. It really uplifts me.I am a firm believer in 'Work hard, Play hard' with a balance.
Nelao: What is your love message to the world?
Ngutati: Love you. Forgive you. Build you. And after that, love the next person, forgive the next person and build the next person. You cannot do for the next person what you do not know how to do for yourself. Remember, it's a daily effort. Some days will be better than others but spread the love.
We could have talked forever but adulthood was calling, plus we got swarmed by tourists (story for another day). My favorite part of our chat was when Ngutati said, she got tired of waiting for people to valid and love her so she decided she was going to do it for herself. I hope you are as inspired as I am. We don't need to wait for anyone to love us, valid us or to realize how special we are. We already are! So in the words of ms Ngutati Shimopileni "Toot your own horn"!
Until next time,